Mental health: How to cope when you feel lost

A while ago, one of my Facebook friends posted the question, ‘how do I cope when I feel lost?’ My response to his question inspired me to write this post. 

My mental health journey began when I discovered I lived in self-denial, constantly making my situations define who I am. For instance, when I feel lost, I wear the hat of a failure and that did me no good. Since then, I have decided to be more mindful of my life, choices and thoughts, especially when experiencing performance anxiety. One of the ways I achieve that is by applying the Cognitive Behavioural Coaching (CBC) Approach I learned some years ago; it helps me enhance my mood by examining interfering or limiting thoughts. For example, “I feel lost today (performance interfering thought), but my feelings do not define me (performance-enhancing thoughts).” Ultimately, the goal of CBC is for an individual to become their own coach. I’d suggest that you read more about it.

Here are some effective ways to care for your mental health when you feel lost:

1. Pray. I may not get an immediate relief or answer but I always feel confident that I will be fine.

2. Worship: these songs will make you feel lighter on such days.

3. Spend quality time with loved ones.

4. Have some alone time: This is a great way to unburden; however, when you don’t make good use of your time, you may notice an adverse effect on your wellbeing.

5. Put a smile on a stranger’s face—random act of kindness.

6. Remember, it is a phase.

7. Apply the Socratic Questioning Technique. This basically means asking yourself a series of questions that could help identify the root cause of your situation.

8. Speak to your mentor(s).

9. Avoid any form of stress.

10. Watch a movie (preferably comedy).

It is important to note that you might behave irrationally when you feel lost. Therefore, it is advisable to avoid:

• blaming people or yourself for your situation.
• Acting on your emotions.
• Things or places that will make you feel worse.
• Toxic behaviours. 
• Getting worried. I know this is easier said than done. One of the broadcast messages I received today summarized the effect of being worried. “Worrying they say can’t add value to your current situation instead it takes away from you valuable time that can be used for strategizing and receiving from God your next move. Life sometimes is like chess: the fact that a pawn is dead doesn’t mean it is Checkmate.”

It is natural to feel this way sometimes but know that nothing lasts forever; with God, you can overcome.

If you love this blog, kindly share the posts with your friends and loved ones. It will mean a lot to me to know your thoughts in the comments. Love, Grace